Feeling not feeling.

The first time i ever felt like i wanted to learn to love someone 

and that i was strong, 

and i would not be just like the 'others'.

I hate to say this but when i start to give bits of my time and feelings, 

the sense of reliance and attachment just grew much more. 

I am afraid,

that i would not be like that 'I' that i knew before.

Still in the midst of finding out if i like this version of me 

but i guess 21 was about time to find out.